Friday 29 August 2014

How to Stare at Boobs Without Getting Caught


Bummer!  Summer is winding down. As we say goodbye to another fantastic Vancouver summer, we also say 'thank you' to all those wonderful ladies who keep us on our toes and practicing the "look but don't get caught" moves.

How to Stare at a Girl’s Cleavage (from Lovepanky.com)

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What are the Do’s and Don’ts of staring at a girl’s breasts or at her cleavage? Here’s your complete guide to staring at a woman’s breasts without ever getting caught. Learn how you can stare down a gorgeous girl’s blouse without making her uncomfortable or pissing her off.


Unfortunately for men, staring at women’s shirts is as involuntary as a knee jerk. We do want to look at women and see their assets, but it’s all about doing it well, and in such a way that she doesn’t get offended or uncomfortable.
 
You’re not her guy, so what makes you think she’ll be happy to flash her breasts at you without feeling uncomfortable, unless you picked her off the red street.

Checking out some girl’s cleavage or her breasts is not bad, especially if you think it’s attractive. It’s all about the way you go about staring at it that makes all the difference.

THE SIX RULES OF STARING AT A CLEAVAGE
There are a few do’s and don’ts that you should follow to pull off the perfect heist of staring at a girl’s cleavage and walking out of it happily clean!

Rule #1 STARE WHEN SHE’S NOT LOOKING
I know it’s hard to resist staring at a woman’s breasts while you’re talking to her. You wait for a moment to catch a glimpse and you can’t hear anything other than, “look down… look down… look down…” It can be really distracting, especially if she’s revealing a bit of her cleavage.
But you have to hold on. If you really have to look down at a girl’s cleavage, do it when she’s looking away for some reason. That’s the best thing to do, because you get a little sneak peek and she gets to talk to you without feeling uncomfortable. You may think you got away with staring in the middle of a conversation, but remember, a woman is extremely conscious of her body, and trust me, if you look down, she’ll know!

Rule #2 REMEMBER YOUR AGE WHEN YOU STARE
First of all, before we go ahead, I want you to know that I respect women, a lot! I can’t stand a guy who tries messing with a girl, especially when she feels threatened. A few weeks ago, I was standing in line to buy a couple of tickets for a movie. There was this old guy who must have been in his 60′s who was grinning and staring blatantly at the breasts of two girls standing in front of me who were probably still in school!

The girls started to freak out because of his dirty stares, and the whole staring bit was just pathetic. Involuntarily, I yelled out to him, and asked him what his age was. He tried retaliating, but by then, most of the others who were feeling just as uncomfortable joined in, and he eventually had to walk out without his tickets, but with a lot of embarrassment.

If you’re trying to figure what I’m trying to say here, all I’m trying to get into your head is, if you’re over 30 and haven’t figured out how to stare at a woman’s cleavage discreetly, give it up. And if your idea of sex is something that would land you in jail, then see a therapist. We’re trying to have a good time staring at a woman’s tee shirt, but not at their expense!

Rule #3 WEAR SUNGLASSES WHILE STARING
Wear sunglasses, especially the darker ones. What they don’t know won’t hurt them. If you want to have a good time trying to stare at a girl’s breasts, then use your shades. It’s a win-win situation.

Rule #4 DON’T EVER OVERDO IT
Son of a guns who stare at a woman while feeling themselves up or staring like they want the woman right there can be really threatening and gross, especially on a lonely street. If there is no reciprocation from the woman, stop trying to focus hard below the neck. Look at her for a millisecond, and move on. There’s no need to behave like a psycho pervert.

Rule #5 HOW LONG SHOULD YOU STARE?
Now this is a delicate subject. To you, an hour of staring at a girl’s breasts may seem like a few minutes or even seconds, but it feels terrible for a girl who doesn’t think you’re fanciable or attractive. And how much would her breasts change in an hour anyways. Just a small glance, and nothing more than that. Remember, if you’re having fun at her expense, you’re a pervert and a sadist who should be buried alive!

Rule #6 DON’T DIE A VIRGIN
Have you ever had a friend who goes crazy when he walks into a club, and just can’t take his eyes off any girl out there? He just wants to stare, fantasize, and ogle at all their assets until his tongue drools and drops off the side of his mouth. To him it’s fun. To the women, he’s going to die a virgin! Don’t be that guy.

Follow these simple tips when you stare at a girl’s breasts or her cleavage, and you can make this world a better place.

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